The Power of Trust

 "The opposite of anxiety is TRUST" - I recently stumbled upon this statement and it gave me goosebumps.

As I pondered over this statement, I understood this simple truth and how it resonates so strongly in my life and with my family members.

I'm not an anxious person by nature, but the few times I felt this emotion, it was primarily due to a lack of trust in someone.

Lack of trust is a learned trait through our interactions with certain people around us and our past experiences.

If our close family members disappoint us, we find it difficult to trust others so easily. It takes time to build and nurture trust in any relationship.

Some of us don't trust ANYONE whatsoever. This deep sense of mistrust leads to constant worry, doubt, and fear, leading to insomnia, high blood pressure, and severe anxiety. This eventually leads to continuous dependence on anti-anxiety pills. As we become older, the same thought patterns repeat and we get stuck in the rabbit hole of mistrust.

The earlier we realize this nature, the better it is for us to take corrective steps.

I believe that if we remain dependable and trustworthy for others, the Universe will also respond with people who can be trusted in our lives.

Trust in people, trust in the Universe, trust in the Divine => the more consciously we build these, the more peaceful our lives become.

P.S. Cats show their belly only in front of people whom they trust completely!🙂

Least Resistance mindset

"Try to experience the daily demands of life with the least resistance" - this statement surfaced up in my conscious mind while going on a contemplative walk a few days back.

Our daily lives are filled with demands - from ourselves, our family, our workplace, traffic woes, and much more.

Every such demand is an experience in itself. And our days are a summation of those experiences. Some experiences are memorable and pleasing, while some leave behind a bitter taste.

Last week, I was tired one evening and we decided to order dinner. D was waiting and getting "hangry". The delivery person took more time than expected. After almost an hour, I called him to figure out his whereabouts. He was near my apartment and rushed to my doorstep. He insisted that he rang the bell multiple times, which we never heard, though we were sitting at home. He also sounded a bit aggressive, claiming that he had been trying to reach my number many times. He didn't listen to my arguments and was defensive that we made him wait. I received the order, without arguing back with him. Though it felt unjust, I decided to let go of this experience and not spoil my mood on a Fri evening. 

D asked me, "Are you angry with the uncle because he shouted at you, mommy?"

I replied, "No, that's okay. It's not a big deal."

More than the experience, it is our resistance to that experience that causes greater pain and struggle.

Instead of viewing resistance and acceptance as binary parameters, let's consider them on a spectrum where one end is complete resistance and the other end is total acceptance.

The state of Total acceptance isn't easy to achieve for normal humans. It is more suited for evolved souls with multiple decades of practice.

The state of Complete Resistance is the one that causes severe stress and leads to destabilizing our state of mind for the rest of the day.

In the spectrum,

there are multiple points where

There is resistance, but not at extreme severity.

There is acceptance, but not to the point of total surrender.

Those points where we "resist less" can help us sail through moments of uncertainty, and manage situations beyond our control.

The keyword here is "Try". As we consciously make efforts to "resist less", it slowly becomes a habit.

Ishta Devatas

 En route to my primary school, there used to be this little Muruga temple. I used to stop there while returning home and offer a quick prayer. Along with his brother Ganesha, they have always been my Ishta Devatas.

Chanting Kanda Sashti Kavacham regularly and visiting the temple nearby used to be a routine during my 9th-12th grades. I strongly believe in the power of this chant and have experienced its impact on my mental strength.

Sometimes, I wonder if the lines of Kanda Sashti Kavacham have a similar interpretation as that of body scan relaxation/guided meditation.

I had a small frame with a picture of Muruga that we bought from Thiruchendur long ago. The frame had rusted and I was looking to buy a new picture. While visiting Giri Stores in JP Nagar a few weeks back, I asked if they had a small picture. They brought me one that was slightly bigger than what I wanted. But the image of the Lord was so clear and beautiful that I couldn't resist. I was a bit concerned if the frame would fit in the limited space on my Pooja shelf. As I came home and placed it, it fitted so perfectly in the space that I had planned. Felt so happy that day!

I recently heard in a podcast that the devatas we pray to keep changing depending on what we seek or desire. In the past couple of years, I have started to connect more strongly with Hanuman and Muruga - both embody strength and resilience.

Today, being Thai Poosam, made sakkarai pongal for Neivedyam for dear Muruga. Chanted Kanda Sashti Kavacham and listened to Soolamangalam sisters' version of Guru Kavacham. The magic and divinity in their voice bring out powerful vibrations!

Being a Saturday, chanted Hanuman Chalisa as well.

Personality and true nature

 As we progress through our self-awareness journey, we sometimes tend to suppress or deny our unique personality traits when we are being "influenced" by external sources. Let me explain this with an example:

From childhood, I've always been a doer. I love setting up to-do lists, and schedules, trying out multiple ideas and keeping my mind engaged. While doing my 9th std, I took up Hindi classes in the morning hours, though my school syllabus didn't include Hindi as a subject. I completed Prathmic and Madhyama levels because a kind Hindi Pandit offered the classes for free.

I feel invigorated when I have a long list of things to do. It makes me feel energized when I'm dabbling with multiple projects (personal, home, and work-related).

A few years back, I started to suppress this nature of mine, due to information that came my way. I got misled into believing that I evolved into a doer because of conditioning and social expectations.

I started to make a few changes in my life but it didn't make me feel content. My true nature was saying, "this is not you!". My husband also pointed out the same, having known me for many years.

Slowing down and reassessing our priorities is good for our mental peace, but in the process, am I also denying my true nature?

When a personality trait is formed due to social conditioning, you'll realize at some point that it is no longer working for you. When you drop that nature, you end up feeling so relieved, that a huge burden has been lifted off your shoulders.

Since childhood, I was told that there is competition in school/college and I need to be in the top ranks to get ahead in life. I considered life as a race and colleagues and classmates as competitors until my late 20s.

In my 30s, when I decided not to participate in this race anymore, it made me feel so relaxed. The competitive nature slowly diminished, as it was NOT the real me. As I let go of this trait, it brought in a sense of peace.

Our personality and patterns - Is it ALWAYS influenced by social conditioning?

Or does our inherent nature play a role too in shaping our personality?

Let's introspect and understand for ourselves.

The Temple Visit

 Last weekend, we visited this beautiful Shree Ashapura Mataji temple (near Bannerghatta zoo). The evening Arathi was happening and it was such a blissful experience, singing the shlokas along with the small group of people who had gathered. Felt a lot of positive vibes and divine energy. The waxing moon on a clear sky, with Jupiter and Venus making themselves visible made the whole experience even more surreal.

As a family, we go for a temple visit every weekend. We usually go to a temple nearby, but this year, we started to explore temples in and around Bangalore.

On Jan 1st, we visited the Shrungagiri Shanmuga temple. It was crowded, being the special day, but the small climb up a flight of stairs and the darshan of Lord Muruga made it special.

On Saturdays, I have set up a routine to visit the Hanuman temple and chant Hanuman Chalisa. Ever since I read the book Hanuman Chalisa by Devdutt Pattanaik last year, chanting the verses give me so much energy and strength. The vibrations experienced cannot be explained in words, whenever I chant the same either at home or in a temple.

Divinity is within and we can experience the same through prayers and meditation while being at home. But a darshan in a temple along with other devotees in a divine setting elevates the experience even further.

Routines bring discipline and purpose to our daily lives. Having a routine to connect with the divine brings so much peace and serenity.