Jan 25, 2019

What you seek is seeking you

The last 2 months seem like a blur. Winter is definitely not my favorite season. The dullness, fatigue and the chill made me feel very down. I was lethargic and didn't have the motivation to do anything. Added to that, the new Netflix connection unleashed the couch potato in me. Tougher questions like "what next?" started creeping in, ever since my last consulting contract ended in Dec. I also felt stuck at home because of the cold weather. The afternoon sun rays just didn't seem to give any warmth.

Thankfully, I see a hope of light in the past few days. My Yoga mornings are back to being regular. The winter is slowly packing its bags and bidding goodbye (thank you very much!). I just decided on a whim to go for a walk on my apartment terrace this evening. The beautiful sunset, pleasant weather, cloudy sky and fresh air brought a lot of cheer to my heart. I stopped my brisk walk now and then to look at the busy road - people returning from work, cars gliding through at a slow pace without honking madly and the day slowly winding up.

After a few minutes, I settled into a good rhythm of walking and the thoughts that were bothering me started to make a comeback. I spoke to the universe, "What should I do? I don't want to get into a full time job. I want flexibility and at the same time, meaningful work. I want to work at my own pace and want to create an impact, blah, blah, blah". The usual talk. By now, the universe would have got bugged with the same thoughts from me ;-)

As I continued my walk, a thought just popped in my head, "Give priority to learning". Yes, these exact 4 words. And there it was, the light bulb moment that I was waiting for. The truth hit me hard. I realized over the last few months, I haven't learnt anything new. Sure, I was reading a few books but I haven't pursued learning with rigor, focus or discipline. Whatever I "want" are the outcomes but the means to achieve the same is through learning. 

Learning doesn't have to be tied to an outcome such as exams, interviews, course completion, job etc. But learning just for the sheer joy of learning without any external pressure. It could be anything that captures my interest and curiosity at this point of time. I asked myself, "What are my current areas of interest? What do I want to learn more about?" And the list started growing.
  1. Physics
  2. Evolution and anthropology
  3. Epigenetics
  4. Climate change
  5. Japanese culture
  6. Behavioral psychology
  7. Mental wellness
  8. Nutrition, more on the role of gut
  9. Pranic healing.....it's not because of Petta 😉
  10. Buddhism
  11. Upanishads
  12. Neuro-biology
  13. Minimalism
  14. Growth mindset
  15. Organic gardening
  16. Power of Focus, attention, deep work
It felt so good to have come up with this list. All it needed was a brisk walk outside for 30 minutes by myself, without any gadgets in hand. It is a proof of the amazing power of just being with our thoughts.

2 comments:

Naveen Chandra said...

Good to know. Yeah, the "Me-time" is always the best time. One practice that I have is to make to sure I get this "Me-time" everyday without fail even if its for a few mins.

All the best with your learning!

Anuradha Sridharan said...

Very true...me-time for learning is quite important and relevant.

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