Feb 14, 2021

Being environment-agnostic


 

Whenever someone asks me how to quit junk foods, my first suggestion would be "Out of sight, out of mind. Don't stock them up at home".

Imagine a pack of chips lying inside your snacks cupboard. You are not into the habit of reading nutrition labels yet. You are not aware of the information that packaged foods are harmful to your health. You will be tempted to munch on that pack of chips when you open that cupboard.

Once you learn to read the nutrition labels of junk foods and how such ingredients impact our body, you will eventually stop eating them. Once your taste buds get used to real, natural foods, the taste of junk foods would be so unappetizing that you wouldn't be tempted to buy them when you are inside a supermarket.

Many years back, I used to be so addicted to Lays chips. But now, when a pack of chips is placed right on my table, I wouldn't be tempted to open it. The presence of that pack doesn't tempt me in any way.

Similarly, with uncomfortable relationships, the "out of sight, out of mind" strategy works. When this person is not living under the same roof as yours, you wouldn't be thinking about him/her, you would move on with your daily routine and you would be flowing freely.

But when that out-of-sight becomes your everyday sight, the uncomfortableness grows, you get triggered, you feel negative emotions. Are these emotions addictive? Maybe.

But we need to realize this.

If you hold anger, remorse, or resentment towards someone, that person doesn't get impacted in any way. They continue to lead happy and peaceful lives. They might get good sleep, they might feel relaxed. BUT it is YOU who would be losing out on all those important factors. So learn to let go of such emotions for the sake of your well being. 

Question yourself - Is it your EGO ensuring that you hold onto those emotions for longer? Is it self-pity?

Aim to reach a state where even if they are right next to you, you wouldn't be impacted. You will continue to be who you are, you will continue to flow freely. Their presence, their words, their actions, and inactions wouldn't bother you. Think of that Lays chips pack lying on your table, untouched. Similarly, all negative emotions will be far from your mind, untouched. You would be environment-agnostic. Your happiness and peace will be with you always regardless of how the environment around you changes. I understand it is a far-fetched goal. But worth aiming towards.

This is more of a self-reflection post that I wrote for myself. Sharing it here, so this might help others with whom the underlying message might resonate.

P.S. Please note I'm only referring to uncomfortable relationships. This strategy doesn't apply to toxic/abusive relationships.

1 comments:

Lakshmi said...

I've noticed that my agnosticism to people (in or out of my sight) is closely related to my hormonal balance. I am therefore hyper-careful during periods I know my hormones are going to adversely affect my response to others. I tell myself "they are them, I can't change them, I can change the way I feel about them" all the time. Works sometimes.

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